Not Even the Typical Weirdness
by alchemyfreak42
Summary: Danny gets dumped through a portal with a bunch of Ectoranium- into a room full of gibberish-speaking heroes. The only one who speaks anything even remotely similar to a language Danny can understand sounds like a child who's only experience with Esperanto came from bad memes and old movies. The sad part? It isn't even the weirdest thing to happen to him that morning.


_**If any of you've read "Just the Typical Weirdness" by Pandemi, that's where this came from. If you haven't, I'll include a link at the bottom. This is meant to be an alternate version from Danny's perspective, but it stands on its own well enough. When my roommate suggested I created this, the second chapter hadn't been posted. For those who worry, don't- I cleared this with Pandemi; it's cool. **__**As always, I am always delighted by reviews. Feel free to send them in, or PMs if you have a request.**_

_**Right, now that we've finished with the obligatory intro, read on!**_

-HAVEYOURFIRSTLINEBREAK-

His day had started off with the usual amount of weirdness you'd expect from a kid who didn't know how to die properly. The usual amount for the son of the most famous (or _infamous_) ghost hunters in the world, who had himself become a ghost. That is to say, his day started off with quite a bit of it.

Dad accidentally let the wieners out of the fridge when he was looking for his fudge, resulting in the Fentons uniting to put down the latest rebellion; Jazz talked about something other than psychobabble for once- the wieners; and Wulf popped out of a portal when he was on his way to meet Sam and Tucker at the Nasty Burger.

Five minutes and quite a bit of nervous babble later, Danny was somewhat caught up on the situation: there was Ectoranium loose in the Ghost Zone.

The horror sank in slowly- all Danny could think at first was that there would be so _many_ ghosts in pain, agonized and unable to get away from it. Then, Danny realized that it was even worse than he'd thought initially: _ectoplasm deteriorated after prolonged exposure_. That meant that the _entire Ghost Zone_ could be falling apart.

That was… not good. Very not good. In fact, it made his stomach twist with horror and the world spin around him.

In spite of the churning anxiety in his gut, though, Danny did what he did best: he went to help. It took another thirty minutes of chaos, shouting, and trying his best to not get killed before he was able to appreciate just how _bad_ an idea it had been.

Danny was still writhing in pain as he flopped out of the portal, slamming into the ground as hunks of Ectoranium tinked onto the ground around him, on him, in his _hair_-

He was being grabbed, dragged away from the stuff thank _heavens, _even if it meant his arms were being jerked behind his back and fastened tight with a rope.

People moved rapidly, the ones not securing him snatching up the Ectoranium and dropping it in a box that somehow made it stop hurting. A distant part of him noted that he _had_ to get one of those.

Danny let himself hang limply in the grip of the people holding him, just gasping as the pain began to fade. _Ow._

Oh, he thought dimly, there was another ghost here, or maybe a halfa. The man was groaning, letting one of the people haul him to his feet before the room unanimously decided Danny was the most interesting thing in the room.

In that moment, Danny realized two things:

One: He was surrounded by half a dozen superheroes of the kind he'd only read about in comic books. This lead to a brief flash of _where the hell were __you_, which was promptly quashed by the second realization:

His arms were firmly in the grips of two of the heroes and his torso wrapped in some sort of glowing cord held by a third. None of them looked overly happy with him. In fact, most of them looked like they would quite happily hand him over to Walker. The only exceptions were the other ghost, who looked like Danny felt, and the guy dressed in all black, who looked like he'd happily hand Danny over to the _GIW_. Which- _way_ worse. No thanks.

Wait, _were_ these guys going to hand him over to the GIW?

_Nope, nope, nope nope nopenopenope-_

"Please don't give me to the GIW, I don't want them to do lots of very painful experiments on me!" He babbled, "I'm not evil, I swear I didn't mean to bring the Ectoranium here I was just trying to get it out of the Ghost Zone but it's really hard to focus when it feels like your core's being yanked out through your throat!"

Danny jerked against the people holding him, went intangible only to double over in pain. Too soon to use his core- _crap_.

Also, _ow_.

Again.

They were talking at him- what were they _saying?_

Two of them- the ghost (blue outfit, red cape, big 'S' on his chest) and the guy with the lightning bolt on his chest (weird things on the side over his ears)- were talking at him, the ghost's eyes pinched in concern and both frowning intently.

"Why can't you just speak _English?"_ Danny demanded, "If you're going to dissect me can you at least let me know why or where I am?"

The lightning guy groaned and disappeared, only to reappear on the other side of the room- was he seriously wasting the energy to teleport across a _room?_\- and a green one (cool ring, weird… thing on his chest) took his place, motioning to his chest and taking several slow, deep breaths. Once he had, he looked pointedly at Danny and waited.

Danny copied him, breathing slowly and forcing his lungs to follow the pattern-and suddenly he could think again. Huh. So hyperventilating apparently did something to him even in ghost form… or maybe he'd just been panicking.

He looked around again- none of the people looked overly interested in cutting him open anymore, except the one in black, but Danny was starting to get the feeling that this was just the Sam of the group- dark, angsty, and painfully protective of the people he chose to care about.

Aaaand Danny had dropped in and effectively tortured his buddy a bit. Oops. He swallowed nervously.

The dark one stared at him for a long moment, turned to the ghost, and said something. The ghost looked doubtful, nodded decisively, and turned to Danny. Uh-oh.

"Hey bruh," the guy said, "You get the down-low in Kryptonian lingo?"

Danny's mind went blank. _What?_ This was a _grown man_, with a neat haircut and a fancy cape. Talking like a kid who'd never heard of grammar. In _Esperanto_. Even _Danny's_ Esperanto was better than that!

"Kryptonian?" Danny asked hesitantly. "Uh, no? If you mean Esperanto, yeah, but I'm not sure what you're saying. Can you speak, y'know, normally?"

The guy blinked. The one in green choked on a laugh.

"I'll… fake it 'til I make it?" Oh, boy- this was going to be a long couple of minutes. "What's your callsign?"

"You can call me Danny. I'm not trying to be pushy or anything, but are you a ghost? You don't exactly look like one."

The guy pulled back, looking like he'd been accused of being a Brony- surprised and a bit insulted.

"A ghost? Like a bloke who kicked it and decided 'naw man, I wanna chill out here for a while longer, you go on ahead, yeah?' Whachu thinkin' that sorta mess for?"

Oh, _jeez_\- that was- that was _rough_ to translate. Once he'd managed to figure out what he was saying, though, Danny gestured at the box. The one with the Ectoranium in it. That had hurt the other guy, too. "It's pretty obvious, dude. I've never heard of Ectoranium hurting anyone but ghosts, and I've been pretty much everywhere."

Not-A-Ghost tilted his head, mouthing the words as he slowly translated Danny's explanation, blinking a couple times toward the end before he nodded a little to himself and shot Danny another considering look. The dude in green still looked like he was trying not to choke on his laughter, but the rest of them were still some combination of wary and suspicious.

Danny widened his eyes slightly and tried to look innocent. "Uh, don't you think it's time to untie me? I won't hurt any of you- cross my heart and hope to die."

Not-A-Ghost blinked again and shook his head a little- it was clearly a beyond-weird day for him. Danny just wished he could say the same. This was pretty much just average, at this point.

Not-A-Ghost still shrugged and agreed, saying something to the lady with the rope, who nodded and leaned down to untie Danny. He watched them as he rubbed the soreness out of his wrists. He might not be able to understand them, but he could still watch their body language.

Besides, he was bored and they were pretty interesting. Even so, the only words he caught were 'Ectoranium' and 'Kryptonian.'

What would these guys do if they were the ones in the wrong world, Danny wondered? Probably get arrested for all of eternity, if Walker had anything to say about it. It was probably better that Danny was the one doing the world jumping, then.

It did remind him- he was supposed to be meeting Sam and Tucker for lunch and Doomed.

"Sorry to interrupt, but I should probably get going soon. Does anyone know how to open portals?"

_Shhrrrkk_!

Right on cue, Wulf's claws poked into the air and dragged downward, slicing until there was a swirling hole in reality large enough for the enormous ghost to step through.

"Don't worry," Danny grinned and waved his hands at the rest of the -hopefully- heroes, who were clearly ready to fight, "It's just my buddy Wulf picking me up."

"Friend Danny!" Wulf grabbed him, squeezing Danny tight in a hug that had everyone tensing again, "I found you! I thought you were gone when you fell through the portal with all that Ectoranium, but I found you and we can go back!"

Danny patted him on the arm and turned to the maybe heroes, waving cheerfully at them. "We sure can, buddy. Thanks, guys- see you around!"

He turned back, following Wulf into the portal and shaking his head with a laugh. "By the Observants though, Wulf- the _only _guy in there who could speak anything even close to Esperanto had _the worst_ pronunciation I've _ever_ heard- and that's including my _dad._"

They chatted until they parted at Sam and Tucker's home, where Danny instantly got reamed out by Sam and Tucker for vanishing on them.

Years later, Danny would idly wish that that had been the most interesting thing to happen to him that _morning_.

Just. Not out _loud_.

_And so it ends._

_**I hope y'all enjoyed. R&R please!**_

s/13241361/2/Just-the-Typical-Weirdness


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